I’ve always been the mom who does it all. I homeschooled our five kids, cooked from scratch, worked full-time, helped run a ministry, and wrote and led Bible studies. For several years I even made hundreds of jars of homemade jam each fall to give away at Christmas. (Yes, really.) I loved my full life, and I felt accomplished and purposeful in it. I don’t think I even realized that what I did had become my identity.

Over the past few years, aging and health issues have started to catch up with me and force me to slow down. It has been, well, dismaying to discover that I’m tired and simply can’t do all the things anymore. I wish I could say I’ve handled this season with grace. But to be honest, I liked doing all the things, and when I’m not doing, I’m not quite sure who I am.

I was recently confronted by this question: “What if you stopped measuring yourself by how much you carry for everyone else?” I’m still chewing on it. For years I viewed myself as the one who filled in the gaps, who held the family, ministry, work, and even myself together. But I can’t do that anymore. So how do I measure myself? Am I overfunctioning out of pride? Where am I leaning on my own strength instead of on God’s?

I don’t have all the answers yet, but God has been gently teaching me to let go, and showing me that I don’t have to hold it all together. Colossians 1:17 says that holding things together is Jesus’ job:

He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.

I’m especially encouraged by the verses just before it. Verse 16 tells us that everything was created through Him and for Him. Jesus isn’t holding something He doesn’t care about. He made the universe, and He loves us. That includes me. And you. Verse 15 reminds us that Jesus is God who came close and put on skin so that we could know Him. We’re not being held by a vague force or a distant unknown figure, but by God Himself, who cares for us. He’s holding all things together — even me. And even you.

It’s going to take me a while to go from knowing this “in my head” to working it out in real life. I certainly don’t have it figured out yet. But I’m starting to learn to open my hands and let God be the one who holds it together.

*****

Maybe you, like me, are carrying too much. Maybe you’re tired and stretched thin, or quietly afraid that if you set something down, everything will fall apart. Consider this your invitation to rest in the arms of Jesus, who is holding you, and me, and everything else.

This is the theme of our women’s retreat this year: Held. And ladies, this is your invitation to come rest, worship, and learn together on Santa Rosa Beach, Florida. It’s February 4-8, and registration is open at FreeGrace.in.

You don’t have to hold it all together. You are held.